JOURNEY FROM YES TO I DO: WIFE

I am scared, why lie, I am a firm believer in until death do us part. It’s one thing to get a good man but you also need to be a good woman for him I mean no doubt you can list the qualities you would want in a mate. It is much more difficult, however, to look at yourself to determine how you can contribute to a marriage. The jokes are there on how in marriage there is one who is right then then there is the husband, but seriously, to be a good wife, what does it take? Is it being a good cook or taking care of the home? These questions have plagued my head for quite a while now. In the not so distant past, the perception of what a wife and her roles were, vastly differed from today’s accepted views. A "good" wife was stereotyped as a soft-spoken, submissive homemaker who was the universal mother and visually stimulating even though the situation possibly resembled servitude more than companionship. So yes the times have changed drastically now a wife has the choice to be a supportive homemaker who provides services for her husband out of love and adoration, which are reciprocated by him or she is now allowed to bear nearly half of the financial responsibility in a household and balances the household responsibilities with her husband equally. The Bible often refers to a good wife being a good thing. And then in the book of proverbs it gives a detailed account of what exactly a good wife is and does. In Africa., at least how I read is, the girl child has been confused, I am just saying that since the fight of equality started taking place, the expectation on HER is high, we are taught that we have to succeed in school that we are equals to the boy child, we know that what a man can do we can do better (something we have pushed too far) then comes an age where if you are not married then it starts being frowned upon. If you are about to get married then you are taught things that as a child you grew up knowing as old fashioned. Qualities such as loyalty, honesty and the ability to compromise are something that I hold dear and I think make a good marriage( best way to show submissiveness, if you ask me ). Having a mate with whom to share life's joys and sorrows is truly a blessing; the hard part is staying true to yourself and not losing it when trying to play a role.

24 THINGS LEARNT WHILE 24

24 THINGS I LEARNT WHILE I WAS 24 This week in exactly 2 days to be precise, I turn 25, what a scary thought. As a child, 25 was ancient and to be very honest it still is, I mean, it’s only 5 short years from the big 3 0. Anyway, I sat down this weekend and reflected on all the things that I have gone through, seen, and I was like, you know its true life is really the best teacher. I realized I have gone through a lot, but I will give you a list of the 24 biggest things I learnt: 1. Love yourself. Become your own priority: this came a bit late but am working on it, 2. Some things just aren’t meant to be. And if they aren’t, move on to what is waiting to be. 3. First impressions are completely worthless 50% of the time. 4. The greatest truths in life are uncovered with simple, steady awareness. 5. Nothing heals wounds like time. Sure some things will always hurt when you reminisce on them, but with every passing day, time will help lessen that pain. 6. Friends become strangers. And more importantly, vice versa. 7. Goodbyes are always sad. Especially when you know that it will most likely be the last time you see that person ever again. 8. Pictures are of great importance especially of loved ones and get-togethers. Take many, there will come a day when you are glad you did. 9. Kindness and hard work will take you further than intelligence. 10. People deserve a second chance, but not a third. 11. Consider things from another’s point of view rather than your own all the time 12. Bottling up your feelings slowly kills you on the inside. Find someone you can talk to. 13. Being an adult can be fun when you are acting like a child. 14. Love has nothing to do with looks, but everything to do with time, trust, and interest. 15. What you learn in school doesn’t really matter. You rarely use it actually, 16. It so important to be able to manage your time and money. 17. When you lie, you eventually get caught. That is a guarantee. 18. We are all social beings, but at times it doesn’t hurt to be an island. You learn so much about yourself, other people and the world when you’re alone. 19. People are not mind readers. Tell them what you’re thinking- especially the man in your life 20. Accept and embrace change, its hard but you have to move with the times. 21. Always be honest with yourself and others. It creates a name for you. 22. Live a comfortable life, not a wasteful one. 23. Be respectful of others and make them feel good. So respect your elders, minors, and everyone in between. There are no boundaries or classes that define a group of people that deserve to be respected. 24. The most important one was this IN ORDER TO GET, YOU HAVE TO GIVE. – SUPPORTING, GUIDING AND MAKING CONTRIBUTIONS TO OTHER PEOPLE IS ONE OF LIFE’S GREATEST REWARDS. EVERYTHING YOU DO COMES BACK AROUND. When I turn 25 I shall tell you what I plan to achieve by the time I am 30