ROMANCE

In a previous article I wrote about romance in Relationships, which got me thinking, do guys really know what romance is? It took me back to the beginning of a relationship, where there is mystery, excitement and even the anticipation of knowing the other person. For us women or me for that matter, romance is the act of being lavished with personal attention or with acts of chivalry, courtesy and love. Imagine romance does not have to be expensive. It is the time and attention that makes romance attractive to us, not the amount of money spent. Romance is not always about sex (though it could lead to it) it’s the way you express your affection for me. For me romance is not the big things but the small things. I believe romance is an important means of communication, and I am not referring to the physical attraction you have. Sex is for that. This is for displaying the respect and honor you have for me as your partner and the love that I am freely giving you. Do you know it can be as simple as saying I LOVE YOU? As long as when you are saying it you really mean it and are willing to do anything for me as the special person in your life. Loving another person comes without stipulations if it comes with strings attached then its deep seated opportunism and not love. What I am trying to say is, if I cook your favorite meal, I don’t expect flowers tomorrow but hey that doesn’t mean you mistreat or undervalue me, bring me my flowers. I don’t know about most of you, but have you ever noticed romance is mainly poured thickly (by men of course) when something isn’t going right? I am not sure but I think (correct me if I am wrong) it hits them(men) that waah I am going to lose her, and then the whole realization that it can be lost, forces them to get a deep appreciation for it. I have come to notice that romance is easy when you are dating. I don’t know if it’s the chase that fuels guys and makes them more exciting but once a relationship is formalized or even guys get married things change, it’s like the challenge is gone and the spark that caused the romance has died. (I guess this is why some people believe in short periods of dating and short periods of engagement). Romance is a two-way street. If you want your partner to be romantic, you have to be romantic too. Also you may need to talk with your partner about being romantic. Some partners take hints real well. Others require more direct reminders. Do not be upset if your partner requires more direction. Work with them and help develop the pattern or habit of romance. It will be worth it in the long run. But remember this (CHICS) Remember to take things done for you in the spirit in which they are intended. Okay, maybe the surprise gift you received wasn’t exactly something you’ve been dying for…be appreciative of the giving, even if you’re not of the gift. The fact that someone was trying his/her best to think of you should count for a lot.