They say Love isn't a decision. It's a feeling. If we could decide who we loved, it would be much simpler, but much less magical. I have been having an ongoing argument on whether you love your Husband/fiancée/ boyfriend or are you in love with them? Apparently being in love is something that women have concocted anyway I don’t want to talk on love, the sweet butterfly kiss feeling. No I want to talk about this side of love:
Love’s first blushing fading? Lost that loving feeling? Love is not all around?
Are this just clichés or does it actually happens? When you started your relationship you had powerful feelings of love towards your partner, but these have now faded. Or you find, you have become bored with the relationship and wonder whether it will last. What happens in a long-term partnership when one half of the team feels as though he or she is falling out of love? Is the love really gone? Or are Most of us probably allured by the attractive notion that effortless relationships exist. Whether it be happily-ever-after marriages, or friendships which last forever, or parent/child bonds which supersede the need to understand each other, or is Love a fabric which never fades, no matter how often it is washed in the water of adversity and grief?
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
WHY MEN BEHAVE BADLY
“Kwani all men must have kids with some woman whom is not their partner?” Was the beginning of a heated conversation with the girls on a random Sunday afternoon? My answer was hell no, then I was asked to go through my list of “boys” and the sad fact is most of my friends do have Baby Mamas whom they do not necessarily see but assist with the child.
This got me thinking Why Do men Cheat.Recently the Time Magazine had an interesting article on SEX, LIES and ARROGANCE: What Makes Powerful Men behave so badly. They tried to blame the Three Vices on why men cheat but I beg to differ. For the purposes of this blog just hear me out: I think men be they rich, poor or just comfortable will cheat and it has no reason to do with Sex LIES AND ARROGANCE and this has to do with according to one Cyril Connor “that it’s the fear of middle-age in the young, of old-age in the middle-aged, which is the prime cause of infidelity, that infallible rejuvenator”
i mean think about families, friends or just a cousins- friends- sister who has had either a woman who comes out of the wall claiming they are in love with your husband/ boyfriend/ fiancée or a child dumped in your house and the child is calling your husband/ boyfriend/ fiancée Daddy. I am not trying to say that if one cheats with so and so they have to fall in love or a baby has to be the fruit of an affair. It’s just somehow, some way it always comes out of the woodwork. If you don’t believe me then watch Cheaters with Joey Greco and its millions of fun or so I hear (( Nothing against the programme, but I think its trashy) or ask those who watch it what their obsession is.
We know of many women who have stayed with their partners after they have cheated, some really famous people and some not so famous people me included. ( just to digress) if you stay with your partner after he has cheated on you, then do you open a new account somewhere go to adultfriend finder and get yourself a hook up? I mean si he also cheated. It’s not easy (speaking from experience). anyway when I choose to stay someone asked me whether it’s a sign of weakness on my part and for the longest of times that was my battle then I realized The ability to forgive someone makes you a better and stronger human being. It takes greater strength of character to rebuild a relationship after an affair, than to just give up and quit. But this is only once you realize that the only person responsible for the adultery is the adulterer and that the relationship wasn't as good as it could be because if it were there would've been no reason to cheat. May sound harsh, but it's true. Therefore do not go back to the relationship as was . but What happens if it occurs again? I will let you know in the next blog.
This got me thinking Why Do men Cheat.Recently the Time Magazine had an interesting article on SEX, LIES and ARROGANCE: What Makes Powerful Men behave so badly. They tried to blame the Three Vices on why men cheat but I beg to differ. For the purposes of this blog just hear me out: I think men be they rich, poor or just comfortable will cheat and it has no reason to do with Sex LIES AND ARROGANCE and this has to do with according to one Cyril Connor “that it’s the fear of middle-age in the young, of old-age in the middle-aged, which is the prime cause of infidelity, that infallible rejuvenator”
i mean think about families, friends or just a cousins- friends- sister who has had either a woman who comes out of the wall claiming they are in love with your husband/ boyfriend/ fiancée or a child dumped in your house and the child is calling your husband/ boyfriend/ fiancée Daddy. I am not trying to say that if one cheats with so and so they have to fall in love or a baby has to be the fruit of an affair. It’s just somehow, some way it always comes out of the woodwork. If you don’t believe me then watch Cheaters with Joey Greco and its millions of fun or so I hear (( Nothing against the programme, but I think its trashy) or ask those who watch it what their obsession is.
We know of many women who have stayed with their partners after they have cheated, some really famous people and some not so famous people me included. ( just to digress) if you stay with your partner after he has cheated on you, then do you open a new account somewhere go to adultfriend finder and get yourself a hook up? I mean si he also cheated. It’s not easy (speaking from experience). anyway when I choose to stay someone asked me whether it’s a sign of weakness on my part and for the longest of times that was my battle then I realized The ability to forgive someone makes you a better and stronger human being. It takes greater strength of character to rebuild a relationship after an affair, than to just give up and quit. But this is only once you realize that the only person responsible for the adultery is the adulterer and that the relationship wasn't as good as it could be because if it were there would've been no reason to cheat. May sound harsh, but it's true. Therefore do not go back to the relationship as was . but What happens if it occurs again? I will let you know in the next blog.
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