THE JOURNEY FROM YES TO I DO:THE HUSBAND

As I get into this journey of marriage I find myself with so many thoughts. Thoughts of stuff like the roles played by us (those in the relationship), what is expected? I am A and The woman in this relationship and most of my perceptions of men have been greatly influenced by my dad. Unlike most women I didn’t have that list of what my man would be like, all I knew, was that he has to have a tumbo (big tummy) yes (weird but it’s the only requirement). I don’t know where this thought originated from but it seems to be of importance as it runs through my mind often. I might not have the ridiculous expectations of that, he has to be 6 feet, a balance account of less that 40k, but it’s something of importance. One of the thoughts I have been having is that the role of husbands and fathers in a marriage tends to mesh into one another; so much that it becomes blurred on who does what. It’s been said that a girl can find her prince but her father will always be her king. A father is such a monumental person, he is not just a mentor and role model, but he also teaches more than how to say ones ABC’s. From my dad I learnt a lot from how he treats his wife to how dedicated he is to his career, he gave me my first impressions on how men behave. So with all this in mind, maybe those lists that women carry or make some might be unrealistic but it kinda makes sense. For me, when I think of the perfect husband/father is one who puts his family first, one who shares parenting with his wife, that he can guide his children to be good citizens. A man who knows romance is not a slap on the ass and “how about it?” one who is encouraging and supportive, not just to his children but wife and family as a whole. One who knows his wife needs time out and hobbies too. Who listens and can communicate, and has absolutely no fear in showing his love and appreciation. Mr. Right and I don’t live together nor do we have children but this are the qualities I hope he shall portray. I hope that I will reflect the same qualities back to him. Love is a complicated thing; it can be easy and light without a care in the world. Then at times it’s backbreaking through trenches of mud. A married couple I know told me that even the best of us can get lost and let our loved ones down. It doesn’t matter as long as MOST OF THE TIME we are empathetic and loving, trying to meet each other’s needs. Most of us think of the wedding and not past it, you know. My prayer is that this marriage works till death do us part.