Sunday, January 22, 2012

THE JOURNEY FROM YES TO I DO: Pre Wedding Jitters

WARNING THIS IS A VENUE FOR ME TO RANT AND RAVE ON THE PROCESS OF ME BECOMING A WIFE, SO IT MIGHT NOT MAKE SENSE Ok, so the date has been set (yep) and at the end of this month we officially start the negotiation ceremonies, the one thing I want in this whole step is the cultural aspect, I am so less bothered with the white wedding, that, I will do more for my family. The traditional steps are normally four, the first one being a ‘kuhanda Ithiigi” (a booking ceremony) then followed by a Ruracio (dowry payment) negotiations) then followed by the itaara (where you go see the boys home) then last but not least, kuhoya uhiiki ( asking for the wedding). We are at the first step and so I am planning the first visit which is the Kuhanda ithiigi, this is the introduction of families, the booking of the bride and for our families to start preparing and accepting that we want to be man and wife. This is where the pre wedding jitters start, don’t get me wrong, I think Mr. right is the right guy for me, and I Do want to spend the rest of my life with him, however the switch of roles is the hard part, for the past couple of years we have been boyfriend and girlfriend and those roles have been perfect, OK so the road has not been smooth and we definitely have had our tough times, but then we both had the luxury to go home. It wasn’t like we had been closed in and ooh we live together so we have to……..if I got tired I went home, if we didn’t want to see each other we didn’t even call but now we start a new journey, and the responsibilities that this roles carry are magnanimous, before I started writing this article, I was talking to my pal and I was like now I cant tell him to get chips hapo chini, now I need to make sure he is well fed. Where did all this start, as I said at the end of the month we have the first visit, something that I knew was so far away, so was not that ati pressured, then on Thursday my mum tell me we are 70 something and Mr. right tells me they are 30 something so we need to accommodate at-least 100 people, ooh and my folks (even dad has gotten into the mix) are like “oh we forgot to invite so and so” as in do this people know I am shy and that I am not sure on how to face such a crowd. Anyway so as I said I want it really traditional, as in fermented porridge, muratina (ya mwana ni nyuo ni ya mwana). So Friday morning pap, off to have muratina done and the person says waah that is so soon, and then it hits us ( was with mum) we have no idea who is cooking for this crowd ( PRESSURE MUCH) anyway the muratina was found and guess what I got ruhia’s (traditionally muratina was drank from a ruhia, this is a cows horn) and tuhiururi (calabash, for porridge) so I started getting excited but still with butterflies in my tummy. Then my mother asks me what are you wearing and I am like I don’t know so we start dress shopping, then my mother sees this lovely outfit and she say that this is what you are wearing and you will do your dreads like this and have them curly here( she truly doesn’t want to let go) anyway I don’t like the outfit and I tell her so and she tells me whatever dress you wear I have to approve of it, so she tells me,drop me home and go shop sawa mum. That is what has happened this week in my planning shall update more on the drama, Mr. Right and his family are meeting today will definitely add sugar to this dish