"WE’RE CAPTAINS OF OUR SHIP: PARTNERSHIP, FRIENDSHIP"I heard this quote in a seminar i once attended and i had been questioning myself is it possible to be happy, in love, and have a relationship that lasts in today’s elec- tronic, e-mail, voice-mail culture? All people change over time, people sometimes say that their partner has changed . "They're not the person i met all those years ago!' no - they're not. Chances are that you both have changed in many ways such as interests, confidence and attitudes.Most couples go through a number of stages in their relationships:
1.IN LOVE ...this is a time when couples wear rose-tinted glasses, and idealise each other.
2.RECOGNISING DIFFERENCES .. begin to be aware of the differences between them, and become more realistic in their view of each other.
3.I WANT TO BE ME …here you are learning how to be individuals and much of the energy of the two partners goes into establishing their own lifestyle
4.TOGETHER BY CHOICE ...process of finding each other again, of seeking greater intimacy and deepening the relationship. this phase represents the end of the journey from being "in love" to "loving".
How do you know you are in a healthy relationship?
❏ You feel secure and happy when you’re together and alone—not sad, suspicious, angry, or deprived. ❏ You are inspired by each other to fulfill your dreams and become the best you can be. ❏ You are generous and giving—you want to give all you can to your partner, and are so fulfilled that you also want to give to everyone else around you. Of course, every relationship goes through changes, let’s face it. you just don’t wake up one morning in a bad relationship. the un- healthy symptoms have been there all along—you just weren’t paying attention to them ... or you chose to ignore them. As in sawa you and him may have explosive sexual encounters, but how does he treat you outside the bedroom? like everything else that is worthwhile to achieve, you have to work at it. surviving the ups and downs becomes the glue that keeps you to- gether….Try the 6 H's to a healthy relationship:
- 1. Honesty.
- Finances can be shaky, sex imperfect, stress overwhelming, but all those things can be overcome. Trust is essetial. If trust is broken, your heart is broken. Everything else seems to tumble down, prob- lems become less tolerable, and compromises less appealing.
- 2. Harmony.
- Two people in love similarly make beautiful music together. They don’t need to be the same; in fact, they are more well-rounded when they have differences, like the harmonized musical notes. Their in- dividual choices of notes fit. Y
- 3. Heart.
- The heart is the major organ of the body. It. Having “heart” for one another means nourishing each other. Opening your heart to one another exposes your deepest feelings. And connecting your hearts binds you deeply and inextricably
- 4. Honor.
- It’s a word used in marriage vows for a reason. Honoring each other means holding each other in high esteem, considering each other’s needs, and respecting each other—and an even more revered consideration of each other, worshipping each other.
- 5. Healing.
- You may have to suffer through love wars before you find your one true love. The rejections and hurts along this path require healing in order to open up your heart again. A true love partner becomes a haven from the hurts of the past, while providing a new positive example of how nur- turing love can be.
- 6. Hot.
- Satisfying, sensuous, and erotic sex can certainly be a part of the healthy relationship equation. Having such a healthy sexual connection can increase your intimacy and bind you closer together.
